Sunday, September 22, 2013

I’m Back

Hey, everyone. It’s Kenny again. And I’m…more than a little embarrassed.

It turns out that Waif-chan was the Unnamed Child. And I hadn’t even stopped to consider that possibility.

Last wasn’t happy. He’s barely spoken to me since he killed her. It’s not even like he’s mad at me. He’s mad at Crimson and Gabe. He says they should have known better. With me, he just seems…disappointed. And I think I know why. He’s worried that this might mean I can’t be this “Hero” he’s looking for.

I never asked for this, though. I never asked to be roped into a war against the Fears. I just wanted to survive. It was easier when I didn’t have people counting on me or expecting anything from me other than trying to save my own skin. I’d be angry at Last for being disappointed in me, if it weren’t for the fact that…I actually feel legitimately disappointed in myself.

“I don’t know why it bothers me,” I told Phones the other day as we played a game of chess.  He tapped the table once to let me know he had me in check. “I don’t want to do this, but…I feel like I have to, you know? It’s tough.” He never listens, but that’s maybe why I enjoy talking to him. It’s just easier to get my thoughts out that way, even if he can’t hear what I’m saying.

And that’s where I am right now. Hating myself. Hating Last. Unsure of what to do or where to go.

6 comments:

  1. Well, isn't that the effect of the Unnamed Child - not considering that she might be a monster? It's like being pissed off at Phones for hearing voices. Or being pissed off at a person with cancer for being ill. Last's talking bullshit IMHO.

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    1. I guess so. But if the Fears have such power over me, how am I supposed to fight them? How can I even stand a chance? I'm just some guy, not a hero.

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    2. Everyone is "just some guy".

      Nobody is born a hero. People don't do heroic things because they are heroes - rather, people are heroes because they do heroic things. Like, no one wakes up and says "Oh, turns out I'm a gymnast. Better take up gymnastics." Oh, and no one is born a bullshitter.... you have to talk bullshit first - case in point, Last. ;)

      Everyone is vulnerable to Fears. You, me, Last, and Chuck Norris. Seems the only barrier was being a child hater. Do you really want to be a child hater, though? As a child myself, I'd resent that. Sounds like a miserable existence.

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  2. Hating yourself isn't going to solve anything, in fact it might lead to some fall outs. You made a mistake, it happens, get up, dust yourself off and learn.

    Life is a learning experience after all.

    - Mr. Incognito.

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  3. 1) Don't go all Adam Jensen on us with this "I never asked for this" stuff, none of us did.

    2) Last, cut these guys some.This aren't quirky powerful characters you're dealing with. They're Fears. And frankly you should've known that Gabe would've been the most prone from the beginning.

    But all of you should stop being all negative and at least rejoice over the fact that the bitch is dead.

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  4. I don't know what hes bitching about. It's not your role to fight the fears.

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